


Growing our aching hearts

by BridgetMcKennitt



Category: Ao no Exorcist | Blue Exorcist
Genre: Canon - Manga, Community: fic_promptly, F/F, Feelings Realization, Kissing, Post-Illuminati Arc, Tenderness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-16
Updated: 2017-04-16
Packaged: 2018-10-19 20:18:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10647315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BridgetMcKennitt/pseuds/BridgetMcKennitt
Summary: Shiemi laughed, bright and happy, and Kamiki couldn't help but be swept up in it.





	Growing our aching hearts

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: [Any, Any, Floating on air](http://fic-promptly.dreamwidth.org/491904.html?thread=14718336#cmt14718336)

Sometimes she had nightmares. How could she not? Kamiki would whimper in her sleep and wake up in a cold sweat. Her little sister was alive, yes, but Tsukumo didn't remember her, their mother was dead, and she had barely escaped the Illuminati. She certainly hadn't been strong enough to control the Nine Tails during her possession of it and it burned that she was so weak.

Kamiki sat on the edge of her bed and looked at her alarm clock. It was three in the morning and she was bone tired. She'd only had patches of sleep the last couple of nights and if she wanted to pass her Exorcist Exam, she needed sleep as well as study time. Kamiki rubbed her eyes before letting out a yawn. What was she going to do?

An image of Shiemi flashed in her mind and Kamiki wrinkled her nose at the thought of her classmate. Shiemi didn't want to take the Exorcist Exam, though Kamiki didn't know why, but Shiemi was very knowledgeable on both demon pharmaceuticals and pharmaceuticals in general. There had to be an herbal remedy to help her sleep and if anyone was going to know it, it was Shiemi.

But it was far too early in the morning for her to contact Shiemi. Kamiki sighed and reached for her tamer textbook. She doubted she was going to go back to sleep, so she might as well study in the meanwhile.

When the sun rose, Kamiki got ready and headed towards the hallway that led to the Exorcist shop. Shiemi had given her a key a few weeks ago to the shop, just in case she wanted to hang out. Kamiki hadn't used it until now and, for a moment, she felt bad. It wasn't like Shiemi annoyed her anymore. After everything that had happened to them, along with their classmates, she kind of liked them.

Kamiki took a deep breath. She still had a long way to go before she could trust them, but she wanted to, and she felt like that counted for something.

Just as she was about to enter the shop, Shiemi opened the door and almost ran into her.

"Kamiki! What are you doing here?" Shiemi blinked at her. "You look awful. Have you been sleeping?"

She shook her head. "I haven't. I actually came here to see if you had anything I could take to help me sleep."

Shiemi brightened as she clasped Kamiki's hands. "I do! Would you like to come to my room? I have it there."

"Oh, uh sure. Okay."

Shiemi dragged Kamiki through the shop and into the garden where her room was. Kamiki had slept over one night in an attempt to teach Shiemi about love through her manga which, Kamiki winced, in hindsight probably didn't help. She found out from the boys that Shiemi just shut Rin down when it came to romance. Rin was an idiot, but he didn't deserve that from his crush.

They entered Shiemi's room and Kamiki stopped to stare at just how beautiful Shiemi's room really was. Her dorm room was plain and boring in comparison. Not that her goal was to have a pretty dorm room, but now that she was free to do what she wanted, she _could _make her room a lot more personable.__

__Shiemi released her hand and rummaged through a chest near her bed before pulling out a small box. "Here." She got up from her knees and handed it to her._ _

__Kamiki took the small box into her hands. There were painted flowers all over it. "What is it?"_ _

__"Tea bags. I made it using some herbs in the garden. Drink a cup of that an hour before you want to go to bed and it'll help you sleep at night."_ _

__Kamiki smiled. Shiemi was a genius when it came to plants, so Kamiki knew that the tea bags would work as Shiemi promised. "Thank you. I appreciate this, Shiemi."_ _

__"You're welcome! Sleep is important and I know you're trying really hard to study for the Exorcist Exam." For a moment, Shiemi's mood dimmed and Kamiki found herself reaching out to place a comforting hand on Shiemi's shoulder._ _

__"I don't know why you're not taking the exam yourself since you'd make an amazing Tamer or Doctor. Maybe even both like Okumura-sensei has or Bon is going to do with his certifications. But I believe in you and I think you should start believing in yourself." A thought occurred to Kamiki. "Is it because you don't have as much life experience as everyone else? Because that'll come in time. You've already learned so much since the first time I've met you. We're friends now."_ _

__Shiemi's eyes widened and Kamiki found herself with an armful of Shiemi as she rushed forward to hug her. "We _are_ friends! I'm glad to be your friend, Kamiki. You and the rest of the Exwires have made my life outside of my garden so much more pleasurable than I had ever dreamed. Thank you."_ _

__Kamiki paused a few moments before wrapping her arms around Shiemi's frame. What else was she going to do? As they continued to hug, Kamiki relaxed into it. It was nice hugging someone. The last time she hugged someone was her little sister years ago and that was more out of fear and comfort instead of just out of pleasure and happiness._ _

__Shiemi looked up from pressing her face against Kamiki's shoulder and smiled at her. Shiemi had a pretty smile._ _

__Kamiki didn't know what prompted her to ask, "After our cram classes, would you like to go to the cafe near here and have some hot chocolate?" but seeing Shiemi's smile brighten even more so gave Kamiki funny flutters in her stomach._ _

__"That'd be great, yes! Thank you, Kamiki." Shiemi gave her another hug before stepping back. "I'm so happy that the Okumura brothers dragged me out into the world. I would have never met you otherwise."_ _

__Kamiki felt her cheeks reddening and spun around so Shiemi wouldn't notice. "Likewise!" she croaked out. "Come on, we better hurry before we're late for class."_ _

__She didn't realize she grabbed Shiemi's hand as they left her room until they were already at school and Shiemi was letting go and saying goodbye. Kamiki just stood there in surprise as she stared at Shiemi's fading back. Did her experience with the Nine Tails warp her or something? What was she doing?_ _

__Kamiki shook her head to clear her confusing thoughts. She had the means to sleep tonight and that was all thanks to Shiemi. Now she had to hurry to class before she was late. She wasn't Rin._ _

__But instead of paying attention in her regular classes, Kamiki found herself thinking about how pretty Shiemi was. From her pretty hair to her pretty body to her pretty smile. Shiemi even had a beautiful dream bedroom that Kamiki wished was hers. She wasn't jealous of Shiemi._ _

__Kamiki gasped into her textbook. She _liked_ Shiemi. Now she knew she was under some sort of demonic possession and Kamiki fought not to groan. Shiemi said no to dating Rin in front of everyone, embarrassing him though Kamiki knew Shiemi didn't mean to do that. She didn't want to get shut down by Shiemi like Rin did!_ _

__But her heart sped up a little faster at the thought of Shiemi hugging her. They were going to have hot chocolate this afternoon, so that was plenty of time for her emotions to calm down enough to see Shiemi again. It wasn't like they were going to go on a date._ _

__Her cheeks flushed again. It wasn't a date, but now that she thought about it, it sounded like a date. Good thing none of those thoughts would run through Shiemi's mind so as long as she played it cool, Shiemi would never know what Kamiki was thinking._ _

__Kamiki let out a breath. She needed to stop courting trouble. Her life was plenty exciting as an Exwire in a world where the Illuminati were plotting. Her love life didn't need excitement either._ _

__When classes were done for the day, Kamiki met up with Shiemi and they walked from school towards the cafe a block away from campus. Kamiki made sure to stay some distance away from Shiemi as they walked on the sidewalk, but Shiemi kept drifting towards her._ _

__"I haven't had hot chocolate in what feels like forever. I usually have tea."_ _

__"Hot chocolate is delicious. Whenever I get the chance, I come here and have some because they make the best." Kamiki opened the door for Shiemi._ _

__Shiemi walked through the door before turning to look at Kamiki. "Thank you for inviting me here."_ _

__"You're welcome."_ _

__They ordered their drinks at the counter and Kamiki paid for the both of them, muttering an excuse about owing Shiemi one. Shiemi didn't question it and, when they got their drinks, they sat at a table near a window._ _

__Kamiki cupped her drink with her hands as she stared down at it. Now that she was here with Shiemi, she didn't know what to do. This wasn't a date, but the thought was in her head and she couldn't get it out._ _

__"Kamiki?"_ _

__She looked up at Shiemi's questioning expression and tried to hide her gaze. "Sorry. I was thinking."_ _

__"I saw. What about?"_ _

__An image of Rin looking stunned flashed in Kamiki's head and she shook her head violently. She wasn't going to be embarrassed like Rin did. She knew Shiemi didn't have any romantic feelings towards her, so saying anything was just setting herself up for failure._ _

__"Kamiki?!"_ _

__Now she looked concerned and Kamiki felt bad. She didn't want to worry Shiemi. That led to uncomfortable questions for the both of them._ _

__"Sorry about that. I was thinking about the upcoming exam. True Cross needs more exorcists in the world because of what's happening lately, but they can't churn out new exorcists just because. I have to be strong."_ _

__Kamiki startled when Shiemi smacked her hands on the table. "But Kamiki, you _are_ strong! I've seen you be so strong during these past several months. When I've faltered because I was scared, you pulled me forward. It's me who has to reach your level of strength. I'm so behind on everything." Shiemi's gaze dropped down to the table._ _

__Shiemi was a complete weed, Kamiki thought with some fondness. Why she didn't want to become an exorcist, she wasn't sure, but she hoped that Shiemi changed her mind soon enough before it was too late._ _

__"You're really not, you know. Sure, you were a total simpleton when you first started cram school, but you've grown by leaps and bounds. We're on the same level, you and I, and if you think I'm strong, then you're just as strong." Kamiki nodded firmly and she took a sip of her hot chocolate. They've gone through too much for Kamiki to allow Shiemi to fall back in her courage._ _

__Shiemi's eyes glistened like she was about to cry and her mouth quivered. Even in that moment, Kamiki thought she was pretty. "You really think so?" Shiemi asked._ _

__"I do." Changing the subject, Kamiki asked, "How do you like the hot chocolate?"_ _

__"Oh! It's quite delicious. Thank you for inviting me here, Kamiki."_ _

__Kamiki nodded. "Of course. We're friends." Her voice nearly broke on that last word, but Shiemi didn't seem to notice. It took awhile, but I like having you around. You're better company than the boys sometimes."_ _

__Shiemi laughed. "I don't understand them sometimes, but I'm so behind on everything, so I just chalk it up to that."_ _

__"That's on them, not you. Trust me." Kamiki let out a slow breath. She did it. She was here with Shiemi and, while it felt great, Shiemi didn't think there was anything unusual about them having hot chocolate together, so she wasn't going to freak out on her. But there was a small part of Kamiki that wished it _was_ a date. Shiemi was so pretty and didn't she deserve something nice and normal for once? Even soon to be exorcists deserved normal._ _

__"Hey, Shiemi," she said suddenly. "I have some errands to run before I need to go back and study. Did you want to come with me?"_ _

__"Sure! Where are we going?"_ _

__Images of the two of them walking through a park holding hands flashed in Kamiki's mind and she dropped her gaze. That would be quite nice, but that was too romantic and Shiemi would certainly pick up on _that_ , even as naive as she was. But she didn't want to leave Shiemi just yet._ _

__Then it hit her._ _

__"Uh, I've been asked be a support Exwire today to clean out an infestation in a garden. Since gardens are your specialty, would you like to help out? I don't want to be a bother since you don't want to become an exorcist."_ _

__"I can still help you with Nee-chan." Shiemi's eyes sparkled and Kamiki was pleased that Shiemi was willing to help her._ _

__"Okay, let's finish our drinks and we can go."_ _

__The garden infestation wasn't a rush job and it was simple enough for Kamiki to clear out on her own, but Shiemi didn't need to know that part. As they reached the small garden, Shiemi stepped forward to marvel at the sight of all the flowers._ _

__Kamiki took out two of her contract papers to summon Mike and Uke. There was a hive of low level demons hiding among the flowers and they multiplied fast. She turned to Shiemi. "Are you ready?" she asked._ _

__Shiemi nodded firmly as she held her familiar in her hands. "I'm ready."_ _

__No sooner did Shiemi say those words when the demons popped out of the flowers and sped after them. They looked like tiny furry balls with sharp teeth and Kamiki sent her familiars after them. Shiemi's familiar expanded in size and created a barrier to protect them._ _

__It didn't take long for them to clear out the infestation between the two of them. Mike and Uke disappeared and Kamiki turned to Shiemi._ _

__"You did well," she said. "Thank you for helping me."_ _

__"We're friends. I always want to help out my friends." Shiemi's smile was infectious and Kamiki smiled back at her._ _

__This wasn't a date, but why couldn't Kamiki give it a shot and ask Shiemi out? No one else was around them and there was nothing to lose if she asked her._ _

__"Shiemi? Wait." Kamiki reached out to grab Shiemi's wrist._ _

__"Is something the matter?"_ _

__Kamiki decided it was best to be blunt. "I enjoyed spending time with you today and I was hoping you could go out with me."_ _

__"Go where?"_ _

__Right. Shiemi was naive still and Kamiki steeled herself even further. "On a date. I want to date you."_ _

__Shiemi's eyes widened as she smacked her hands against her mouth. "Oh!"_ _

__She was going to get rejected like Rin. She just knew it. "Shiemi, I like you a lot. You think you're behind everyone else, but that's not true, and besides, the only way to catch up is to experience life. We've experienced lots of life together, right?"_ _

__Shiemi slowly nodded at her, her hands still over her mouth._ _

__"So why not practice dating with me and gain experience that way? Didn't I help you with learning how to be human with my manga?"_ _

__Shiemi nodded again, though this time she slowly lowered her hands. "You did. I love that manga."_ _

__"See! Now you understand why it's my favorite." Kamiki tried to compose herself. That was not important right now. "Do you like spending time with me?"_ _

__"I do, very much so."_ _

__"Do you like me?"_ _

__"I do! But I don't know if the difference between romance and friendship, even after reading your manga." Shiemi's lower lip quivered and she suddenly reached out to grab Kamiki's hands, surprising Kamiki. "Tell me how you feel about me?"_ _

__Kamiki nodded jerkily. She could do that. "I feel fluttering in my stomach when I'm around you and it's really nice when we're together. I find you pretty. I haven't been around much people either growing up, but I know that you're someone who makes me better." Kamiki frowned. "I know I'm not Rin."_ _

__Shiemi blinked at her. "I know you're not Rin. I don't feel like I have to run away from you. I like being around you, Kamiki."_ _

__"You do?"_ _

__"Yeah. Did you mean what you said about practicing dating? Is romance like going to school?"_ _

__Kamiki thought back to her manga and felt her cheeks reddening. "Romance is a lot better than school, but I think everything that's worth it in life takes practice. Why not romance?"_ _

__"But I don't want to ruin anything between us!" Shiemi said, her voice rising to a wail towards the end and Kamiki couldn't help but feel a swell of hope rising within her._ _

__Kamiki squeezed Shiemi's hands. "You wouldn't. How could you? If you didn't hate me when I was rude to you and trying to push you away, and you didn't give up on me when I was kidnapped, then I think we're in the clear. Besides, it's practice. We're bound to mess up. I mess up even now when it comes to summoning and I've been doing that for months."_ _

__Kamiki didn't know what thoughts were running through Shiemi's mind, but she hoped that Shiemi wasn't going to pull away, bow, and apologize. She wanted Shiemi to give them a try._ _

__Finally, after several minutes of silence, Shiemi spoke. "Have you ever kissed someone before?"_ _

__Kamiki blinked in surprise. "No, I haven't. I dream about it though whenever I read my manga."_ _

__Kamiki spotted Shiemi's cheeks reddening slightly. "Your manga is very steamy. I kept thinking all sorts of thoughts when I read it. The heroine kept dreaming about kissing and she'd never been kissed. I've never been kissed." The last part was spoken softly._ _

__"I can kiss you right now. It'll be practice. A girl should always be prepared for a kiss," Kamiki said._ _

__"Really?"_ _

__"Really."_ _

__Without warning, Shiemi darted forward and pressed her dry lips against Kamiki's lips before pulling back. It was over so quickly that Kamiki didn't have time to process that they had just kissed. Not until Shiemi called out her name that Kamiki snapped out of it._ _

__"I'm sorry! I didn't think you were going to do that."_ _

__"You said we had to practice!"_ _

__When Shiemi tried to withdraw her hands, Kamiki held her tight. "I did, but a girl needs some warning first." Kamiki took a deep breath. "Okay, now we can try again."_ _

__This time, the both of them leaned forward and when their lips met in a kiss, Kamiki allowed herself to savor the feeling. This was just as good as her manga. No, even better._ _

__When they finally broke apart, Kamiki felt like she had been running for miles. Shiemi looked stunned herself. Kamiki strove to contain herself. "I'd say that was a lot better. What do you think?"_ _

__"Huh?" Shiemi blinked at Kamiki before nodding her head slowly. "Yeah. That was amazing. You have great ideas, Kamiki." Before Kamiki could thank her, Shiemi continued. "Can we do that again?"_ _

__Kamiki's jaw dropped. Shiemi was certainly a weed, but Kamiki couldn't complain. Not when she wanted to kiss her again._ _

__"Yeah, we can kiss again. How else are we going to get better in dating and romance?"_ _

__Shiemi laughed, bright and happy, and Kamiki couldn't help but be swept up in it. Shiemi wasn't the only one who wanted to grow and right now, Kamiki felt like she was floating on air._ _


End file.
